HORRIBLE SONGS FOR CHILDREN

by Fatcat & Fishface

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about

HORRIBLE SONGS FOR CHILDREN is the first album from FATCAT & FISHFACE, the outlaws of New Zealand children's music.

WINNER BEST NEW ARTIST FOR OLDER CHILDREN AT THE CHILDREN'S MUSIC WEB AWARDS (USA)

credits

released July 9, 2013

All songs written,performed and produced by FATCAT & FISHFACE
Recorded and mixed by Andrew Downes, Wellington, New Zealand
Cover artwork by Cecil Bevis
Typography by Slipper at Charlotte Hird Design
1997

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Fatcat & Fishface New Zealand

FATCAT & FISHFACE are the award-winning outlaws of New Zealand children’s music. Their cheeky style and offbeat humour have been compared to Spike Milligan, Roald Dahl and Maurice Sendak.

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Track Name: LITTLE ANIMAL EATER
Little Animal Eater
She's a little bit of wild inside
Lying right on by the side of the heater
Full of little birds and mice

Little Animal Eater
Little-idle-little-idle-little-idle-little
Animal Eater Animal eater Animal Eater

Little Animal eater
She's a pussy footed little machine
Drinks a pint of milk at night or a litre
Little fangs oh baby she's so mean

Late at night
She hunts alone
Crying out for blood and bone

Little Animal Eater
Purring furrily beside your head
She's the sweetest little meat eating creature
Better say your prayers if she's on your bed
Track Name: FLYBY
Flying high above the city
She was on a mission to spy, to seek, to land.
Under cover of darkness she buzzed Ground Control
And beginning her descent, she dived…

Oh she was looking for a place to lay her maggots
Yes she was looking for a place to lay her maggots

Fly in the kitchen, by the rubbish bin
Buzzing around Buzzing around
Fridge door is open, won’t you step right in
Buzzing around Buzzing around

Oh she was looking for a place to lay her maggots
Yes she was looking for a place to lay her maggots

Settle on a sandwich, bomb the biscuit tin
Buzzing around Buzzing around
Do the mashed potato on a sausage skin
Buzzing around Buzzing around

Oh she was looking for a place to lay her maggots
Yes she was looking for a place to lay her maggots

Yes ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, a marvel of nature is at work in your very home. Be astounded as two wings whip the air at a frenzied speed of 200 beats per second. Gaze in astonishment as two compound eyes collate visual information into four thousand tiny television screens. But there’s more…not one, not two, but six, yes six sexy segmented legs. Send no money, that’s right, send no money. This wonderful once in a lifetime show is now appearing in a kitchen near you!

Set her sights, the fly alights on a fish’s fin
Buzzing around Buzzing around
Honey, jam, leftover ham, toast sliced thick or thin
Buzzing around Buzzing around

Oh she was looking for a place to lay her maggots
Yes she was looking for a place to lay her maggots
Track Name: PRETTY, SWEETIE, HAPPY, LUCKY
Pretty, Sweetie, Happy, Lucky

Pretty wore dresses
Sweetie was nice
Happy was singing
Lucky was charming but cold as ice

Pretty loved flowers
Sweetie loved honey
Happy loved singing
Lucky stayed up all night counting her money

Lucky won Lotto one dark summer's night
She kept it all to herself
She didn't tell Pretty
She didn't tell Sweetie
Or Happy or anyone else

Pretty grew older
Sweetie grew sour
Happy grew quiet
Lucky grew richer, minute by hour
Track Name: LAZY
Lazy lazy
Maybe I'll...never mind
Lazy lazy
I'll get up...sometime

I would but I couldn't
I should but I can't
I just can't be bothered
My motor won't start

I'll do it tomorrow
I'll be there next week
Wait just a minute
While I have a sleep

My mother tells me that I'll rust away
But I lie in my bed anyway
Track Name: PICK ME
The smallest thing
Is bigger than me
But I still grow
On the human bean tree

They never pick me
They never pick me
The ones who do the picking never see what I be
They never pick me
Track Name: FAVOURITE UNDIES
When you've got your favourite undies on
The world's a brighter place
Track Name: YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT
You are what you eat
It’s what you eat you are
You are what you eat you are
What you eat you are
Is what you eat

Woke up face down on a plate
Plate needs food
I can’t wait
What’s for breakfast baconhead?
Porridge spoon
Boiled egg

Fell asleep in my lunchbox
Vegemite
Or might not
Frankenfurter, fish ‘n’chips
Salty dog
Lick my lips

Split the kumara, Greedy Guts
Leave the apple core
Chicken pie must say goodbye
Not mushroom no more
Track Name: JOE
Plenty more fish in the sea, Joe
Plenty more fish in the sea, Joe
If you go swimming
Go swimming with me
Plenty more fish in the sea

Plenty more eggs in the box, Joe
Plenty more eggs in the box, Joe
Can't lift your head if it's full of rocks
Plenty more eggs in the box, Joe

He might be in the garden
Sending shivers down your spine
He might be in the bedroom
Sending bad dreams to your mind
He might be in the hallway
If you leave your toys behind
He's a horrible old monster
Who lives in a bin on the beach

Plenty more stars in the sky, Joe
Plenty more stars in the sky, Joe
You keep staring
You'll get poked in the eye
Plenty more stars in the sky
Joe
Track Name: SINGALONG
Singalong
Singalong
Altogether now
Here's one we all know
Singalong
Track Name: THE IMPOSSIBLE DANCING SONG
It's the Impossible Dancing Song

Stands on your feet
Wears the wrong clothes
Lies through its teeth
And breathes through its nose

It's the Impossible Dancing Song

Laughs in your face
Swears at your mum
Too many fingers
And not enough thumbs

It's the Impossible Dancing Song
Track Name: I NEVER
It wasn't my fault
She pushed me
He hit me first
I never

She did, he did, she did, he did.....I never

I want what she's got
'Snot fair
I got it first
You never

She did, he did, she did, he did.....I never

You never let me
So what
Look what you done
I never
She did, he did, she did, he did.....I never

You better watch out
I'm telling
I'll get you first
You'll never

She did, he did, she did, he did.....I never